Dordrecht, The Netherlands
Dordrecht, The Netherlands
Tuesday, June 29th, 09:00, twelve people, all from different disciplines, different places around the world and of varied ages meet in a small theater in a little town somewhere in the center of The Netherlands.
The characters
One businessman, very serious, (he imports flowers to Europe). Let's call him the Flower, (I have this way of giving nicknames to people I meet, according to a word, to a characteristic.
One teacher, or should I say: The Teacher, still keeping a distance, not completely sure of what she is doing there.
One young girl, her nickname: the Kid. Not because she acts like a kid but because she has a mother.
One Bulgarian student of philosophy who in half an hour will regret her decision to join this demanding master class.
And then there is an older Dutch lady, she is searching, and she knows.
The mother! Oh the mother, she came in declaring that she is the mother. She is always the mother; she came together with the Kid.
Ka came late, she is an actress already.
Windy, I believe, got the most out of this master class. It seemed to me that she was the only one that really changed during this week. It was most difficult for her - she had a constant conflict between her self and the master, having to cross new borders of unknown places. She was strong, brave. It took time but she did it, and she was maybe the only one.
The Driver, father of seven, came in the room with a flute made by himself, it felt like he knew something about life.
Myself, coming from the same place as our Master: The country of Israel. I have been living in Hollandfor the last two years.
Spring, An amputated man.
Walking in the street, being different. He has no arm. Knocking on his love's door with flowers in a vase. The vase, attached to his amputated arm in the place of a prosthesis. She opens the door, accepting the vase with her two hands, turning it, releasing it while putting it on the table between them. That’s it. It is now on the table, no hand, flowers.
Conversation, a real one, begins.
This was the starting point for my project about prosthesis in the department of Man and Well Being at the Design Academy Eindhoven. As part of the process I have visited in several hospitals and have met with amputated people. I tried to examine the uncomfortable world of amputation. When I held a real prosthesis in my hand I felt as if I were holding a puppet. I chose to present my idea through a puppet theater. Then began my journey, starting in the puppet theater in Dordrechet and ending here, in the master class of improvisation by Yehuda Almagor to which I joined due to the great help of Mrs. Damiet van Dalsum.
Our teacher, our Master, Yehuda, began by teaching us a technique for improvisation. Standing in the room, twelve of us, filling it equally. As one moved, the others had to react in space to achieve spatial balance. While moving, we were asked to maintain the thought of fear from each other: The fear of being attacked, and the urge to attack back. At this point I thought that as an Israeli I knew exactly what he was talking about. Naturally, I walk in the world, always knowing who is behind my back, always thinking about how I look, whether I look strong enough, scary enough, trying also to remember to look friendly enough but at the same time, to keep on walking.
Suddenly we found ourselves standing on four - a different point of view. The teacher's face upside down, between her legs, looking at me, The philosopher and flower were rubbing their behinds against each other. Yehuda told us to try to reach each others pom-pom (behind). 'Empty your mind' he said, 'try to have some fun'.
Practice. Repeat. Try again: walk in the room's space, try to keep equal distance between each other, look at each others eyes, try to predict the next move. Look forward and backwards at the same time, wait for your turn to hit, wait for the unexpected hit from behind. Live.
Making sound. Saying I'm alive, attracting attention, creating an identity, declaring a statement. Each one in his or her turn has to seduce the others to get accepted, to be loved, to be wanted. The philosopher was first, I was next. She was free, dancing, they loved her. She was good, I was afraid.
Flower came to me during the lunch brake, telling me that only by reminding himself that in two days everyone will go their separate ways, he can let himself be as free as he really wants. After the brake, we went back in to the room, Yehuda, took out of his suitcase, the masks.
Mask one.
I was the first to try working with a mask.
I chose one with a long nose, a dark colored face, sad. Needy. I put it on and looked at the others, I hhhhhhhhhuuuummmmmed, trying to reach a word. Finally the word 'door' came out. They laughed, it was real, I had a door in front of me and I was in the center and I really felt uncomfortable. The Master asked about the door, and I said: Don’t open the door! I really didn’t want the door to be opened. Suddenly I saw there was another door! We stopped, I took off the mask, we went on.
The fear, having a mask on, being in control, taking it off, putting another one, forgetting, enjoying life, facing the fact that there is nothing, nothing behind the mask, putting another one, a different one. Being.
I am looking forward for the next days. I'm thinking about masks. About prosthetics, the similarities between the two. Hiding behind, being supported, trusting, filling emptiness. The twelve of us can almost get arrested for the things we allow ourselves to do hiding behind the masks.
Second day, a mask is prohibited in Judaism - giving a form is something for God to do. My belief is that every one of us is one's own God. Putting on a mask, allowing oneself to be God, crossing the border, taking responsibility, letting oneself free. So help me God!
Daring to be. The master says that you must be real, that you must be you for others to believe you and identify with you. This was the reason for me to come here, to find a way to say what I have to say without loosing my mind, adding some humor, lightness, comedy. Daring to be me.
Change! We are talking about changing, change the rhythm, change your target, change the energy. Dance, dance, dance. Move to the next, move! Get it back, the attention, don’t lose. By doing so you are in control, the audience doesn’t know what’s coming next. Change!
Again, again the long nose, I found myself crying, I couldn’t reach anything. It was just too long. It seperated me from anything, anyone. I was alone.
I couldn’t move on from this role, I couldn’t reach the chaos that is needed to create comedy. Change! I told the public I am having a hard time walking around all day not only being alone but also smelling. Smelling everyone’s sandwiches, and problems. I can even smell depression. Are you depressed?
She was talking about her fear of crossing the border, of being exposed on stage. She said that when she is on stage she gets stuck and blocked. I said that I experience a different problem. I feel that it is rather easy for me to expose myself on stage but as soon as I take the mask off I feel naked, I don’t have the tools to deal with this exposure. The Master said that we just need to open our eyes and see that every thing is all right and that nobody left. It was hard for me to believe that I wouldn't be left aloneeeeeeeeeeerrrr.
The Philosopher is not easy for me, she doesn't let go, go with the flow. She doesn’t believe in what we do and it blocks me. When I act, when I play, I don’t dare to look in her direction, in her eyes.
The Mother collapsed, crying. She said that she was not so brave and responsible as she looked, and that she felt small and a coward. Afraid of everyone’s expectations. I am happy I came here to this workshop, a room filled with people interested in dealing with the life's deepest complications. I like people who deal with things. Half an hour before I told the philosopher that I feel she blocks me by being an outsider.
The Driver left, he is in his 40's. It was too much for him. I ran after him. We talked about the fact that it is not only about him, but also about the relation between himself and the group. I hope I remember this when I will be in his position. The exercise I just did was ok, I think there is a need for a certain insanity to do these exercises, these connections, these changes, moving from one thing to another, living.
Problems, it feels like we lost focus. No plan. The master is facing some difficulties, the group is too big. I find it obvious that one cannot plan everything, one must stay calm with open questions. People are going to pay to watch us, stressful, ha?
Yesterday was a hard day. We broke, even the master, he couldn’t put in to practice what he was talking about all the time. Taking it easy, with humor, he took the evening off. It was a nice evening; we laughed a lot, he came back, we drank wine. Now things are much better, the group's mood is climbing back up. They, we, want to succeed. It seems as if it is going to be just fine.
Sitting in front of a group of people, trying to convince them that you are insane is not an easy task. Saying out loud all your thoughts and perversions.
Be real, put on a mask, lie, be yourself, be real.
During the five days of the master class I had dinner with a Chinese couple, both artists. After dinner I went to see their studio. Looking at their work, we came to talk about the Book of Tao, as an example for the absolute opposite to the western thought that in order to create comedy, laughter, you must reach chaos, conflict. In the Tao it is clear that no matter what we do, we should avoid the chaos, avoid conflicts, reach balance.
Trust
Pinocchio the liar, having a prosthetics, trying to be normal, to fit in society, being something that you are not, playing a role just like in theater instead of being who you are, being proud, letting society deal with it, letting yourself free.
It is bad news, it is good news, it is difficult, it is radical, it is normal.